JUNE 2014
I had such a good summer last year. I can't bear to read my pathetic posts from the summer months of 2013, but I do remember getting a lot of bike riding in, if nothing else. I did not have a class (I will this summer, and the next), so I was rather carefree. My personal issues were still there, though - no real friendships, lonliness, confusion about other things.....
So thus far, I have enjoyed the good weather and managed to get out to the amusement park (a rarity for me). I am continually frustrated that the person I love (I think) does not wish me to visit. Its about an hour + 10 minute drive. Again and again, I am denied. I haven't seen this person in TWO YEARS! The whole thing is...complicated. I just can't let go - I feel this person should be a part of my life, although it's been one big headache for the last 4 years - when we met.
I did get the "B" I needed. My next class is another bull sh--requirement - Communication or some crap like that. FINALLY, in September, and moreso next January, when I'll have TWO classes, I get to the nitty gritty of engineering.
I mean - I know how to communicate well...I think. Who knows. I get no commentary from this blog, and maybe have had 2 readers in 2 years. haha!
Anyway, it's been a very fun weekend. I even had a nice time shopping with my parents. A daytime date with my parents...haha. Tomorrow is work, though - and this job is starting to really suck. Its a babysitting job, it seems.
The song by Young Guns is well over a year old by now, I think. It finally grabbed my conscious and is #1. Alice in Chains still may score another #1 with the excellent "Phantom Limb". Another song from that album still might chart - the title song, "The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here".
Two fresh entries - the song by Love and Death is a crunchy heavy metal song. I love it. I'm sure it's the type of song that black metal fans will hate. I don't care - it's catchy and I love the "solo", if you want to call it that. Its the part just after that whispering.
The other new entry is a cool song from a band I will probably never hear from again. The chorus is amazing: "welcome to the inner workings of my mind/so dark and foul I can't disguise...nights like this, I've become afraid of the darkness in my mind/hurricane."
Wow - I remember when I used to consider my mind "dark". There are probably a lot of other people who do or did, too. It's because you don't share with people your feelings of self-loathing, hatred of everything, lack of passion for ANYTHING, and so on. You are basically miserable. Who admits they loath themselves? No one. Even among the miserable, its uncool to admit you self loath.
That should be the name of a band - Self Loathsome.
I am edging closer and closer to 50 years old. Will I ever feel I belong anywhere? Will there be someone who digs me, and vice versa, that can be my partner in love?
The show for the improv class, a couple weeks back, was BRILLIANT. The audience laughed and it was an amazing time. A regular at the theater, this girl who is just great, said it was the best level 2 class show she'd ever seen. Yours truly had some great moments, too. It was such a high that it was depressing to realize that will probably never be replicated. I'm not worrying about it, but just recording this positive thing for my stupid ass, pointless blog.
JUNE 2014
1."Bones", by Young Guns 3,1,3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qk3vjIDuy9w
2. "Phantom Limb", by Alice in Chains 2, 2, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQc8WsY-ZbA
3. "Choke", by Alice in Chains 1, 1, 7
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKXSHVuWE8w
4. "Meltdown", by Love and Death -, 4, 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sp1dd_vq5Tg
5. "Hurricane", by MS MR -, 5, 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sj684zcmzw
JUNE 2013
1. "Diamonds", by Rihanna 1, 1,4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWA2pjMjpBs
2. "Can't Get Better Than This", by Parachute Youth 2, 2, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHC302BjEhY
3. "Bride of Infinity", by Blondie 3, 3, 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIIf-Qo8XJo
4. "Glass Mountain", by Radiana -,4,1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL4gIiuCB-A
5. "Live to Rise", by Soundgarden 5, 5, 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3ZNtOcY_1A
JUNE 2004
1. "I Hate Everything About You", by Three Days Grace
2. "How to Lay Low", by The Church
3. "Good Boys", by Blondie
4. "New Heart for Christmas", by Kill Hannah
5. "Meant to Live", by Switchfoot
So thus far, I have enjoyed the good weather and managed to get out to the amusement park (a rarity for me). I am continually frustrated that the person I love (I think) does not wish me to visit. Its about an hour + 10 minute drive. Again and again, I am denied. I haven't seen this person in TWO YEARS! The whole thing is...complicated. I just can't let go - I feel this person should be a part of my life, although it's been one big headache for the last 4 years - when we met.
I did get the "B" I needed. My next class is another bull sh--requirement - Communication or some crap like that. FINALLY, in September, and moreso next January, when I'll have TWO classes, I get to the nitty gritty of engineering.
I mean - I know how to communicate well...I think. Who knows. I get no commentary from this blog, and maybe have had 2 readers in 2 years. haha!
Anyway, it's been a very fun weekend. I even had a nice time shopping with my parents. A daytime date with my parents...haha. Tomorrow is work, though - and this job is starting to really suck. Its a babysitting job, it seems.
The song by Young Guns is well over a year old by now, I think. It finally grabbed my conscious and is #1. Alice in Chains still may score another #1 with the excellent "Phantom Limb". Another song from that album still might chart - the title song, "The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here".
Two fresh entries - the song by Love and Death is a crunchy heavy metal song. I love it. I'm sure it's the type of song that black metal fans will hate. I don't care - it's catchy and I love the "solo", if you want to call it that. Its the part just after that whispering.
The other new entry is a cool song from a band I will probably never hear from again. The chorus is amazing: "welcome to the inner workings of my mind/so dark and foul I can't disguise...nights like this, I've become afraid of the darkness in my mind/hurricane."
Wow - I remember when I used to consider my mind "dark". There are probably a lot of other people who do or did, too. It's because you don't share with people your feelings of self-loathing, hatred of everything, lack of passion for ANYTHING, and so on. You are basically miserable. Who admits they loath themselves? No one. Even among the miserable, its uncool to admit you self loath.
That should be the name of a band - Self Loathsome.
I am edging closer and closer to 50 years old. Will I ever feel I belong anywhere? Will there be someone who digs me, and vice versa, that can be my partner in love?
The show for the improv class, a couple weeks back, was BRILLIANT. The audience laughed and it was an amazing time. A regular at the theater, this girl who is just great, said it was the best level 2 class show she'd ever seen. Yours truly had some great moments, too. It was such a high that it was depressing to realize that will probably never be replicated. I'm not worrying about it, but just recording this positive thing for my stupid ass, pointless blog.
JUNE 2014
1."Bones", by Young Guns 3,1,3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qk3vjIDuy9w
2. "Phantom Limb", by Alice in Chains 2, 2, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQc8WsY-ZbA
3. "Choke", by Alice in Chains 1, 1, 7
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKXSHVuWE8w
4. "Meltdown", by Love and Death -, 4, 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sp1dd_vq5Tg
5. "Hurricane", by MS MR -, 5, 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sj684zcmzw
JUNE 2013
1. "Diamonds", by Rihanna 1, 1,4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWA2pjMjpBs
2. "Can't Get Better Than This", by Parachute Youth 2, 2, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHC302BjEhY
3. "Bride of Infinity", by Blondie 3, 3, 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIIf-Qo8XJo
4. "Glass Mountain", by Radiana -,4,1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL4gIiuCB-A
5. "Live to Rise", by Soundgarden 5, 5, 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3ZNtOcY_1A
JUNE 2004
1. "I Hate Everything About You", by Three Days Grace
2. "How to Lay Low", by The Church
3. "Good Boys", by Blondie
4. "New Heart for Christmas", by Kill Hannah
5. "Meant to Live", by Switchfoot
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