My Top 5 Songs

Late again.  I am depressed.  Again.  I just have had it.  I am big whiny dick, I know.  There are people suffering in this world.  I can't understand why in my head this is so overwhelming that I feel like total shit, making me want to be alone, and to not live anymore.  I just have a very tired feeling inside. Nothing brings me joy.  I am dead again inside. JUNE 2017 1.  "Moth Into Flame", by Metallica 2, 1, 3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4tdKl-gTpZg 2. "Show Yourself", by Mastodon -, 2, 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gUGda7GdZPQ 3. " Phantom Bride", by Deftones 1, 1,  4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSycaeY7qi4 4. "My Name is Human", by Highly Suspect -, 4, 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5-gja10qkw 5.  "Feel Alive", by Red-Sided Garter Snakes 5, 5, 3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qysnVcbA-c4 JUNE 2016 1.  "Cirice", by Ghost 2, 1, 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0Ao4t_fe0I ...

Well, another repeat:  late post this month...school was murder in the final weeks of the term...but got an A anyway, although I feel like I did not learn really THAT much as I should for fucking graduate school....sheesh.....feeling up and down - depressed, then happy, then depressed. What is the point of this stupid blog?!?!??!  What is the point of even going on, I am beginning to wonder.  I am truly alone and no one cares if a white guy over 35 lives, dies, or what he things about anything. Here is my Top 5 for this month.  Not a lot of movement, as my life has not centered that much on music lately.  I have a month until the next, and final semester starts - I am hoping to brush up on my deteriorated music skills, as well as get in some exercise, and other pursuits. That is all - my head hurts, my neck hurts, and I do not fear death. DECEMBER 2015 1.  "Wildfire", by Borgeous 1, 1, 5 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmZI7xFisHA ...

A new year. I won't wax philosophic - I'm not good at that, exactly. You know, opining with clever sentences and saying something enticing of a chuckle or two, while warming your heart in nervous anticipation of another year...I will spare myself the attempt at that. I will say this: I tried to wipe the proverbial slate clean. No more self-guessing. No more apologizing for stupid stuff that doesn't require an apology. Grab life. Face challenges. Stop being afraid of things getting hard or more difficult.  Just do it, dammit!  Accept the days when I feel miserable, or when I don't feel happy, and just deal with it...then move on. Oh, the insanity that is me. I'm so busy with acting opportunities coming up - trying to learn an English accents, practicing monologues, and trying to drop a few pounds to just look a bit healthier. Work is starting to suck, though. I have to amp up my effort. Well, the very cool "Running Backwards" by Geoff Tate's Que...