NOVEMBER 2013
Late again. November is a weird month for me for various reasons too boring to state. I love it, though. It is the advent of the holiday seasons. If I'm in school (which is most of my life, it seems), I can see the light at the end of the semester tunnel.
Things are going so well that I can't help but think of ways to sabotage everything. No, really, I think of cutting myself off from some friends. Abruptly quitting my job. I mean, ANYTHING, even suicide, anything that will hurt someone and make them feel bad. A part of me would enjoy that, even though the 'whole' of me would not.
Weird, I know. It's like I can't just enjoy being....happy. Content. Comfortable in a success that I have created for myself.
I need despair, conflict, sadnesss....This is just honesty here. I realize this problem. I do not know why I HAVE this problem, though, nor how to let it go.
I have a suspicion, though. One reason my mind works this way is that I were to 'let it go', I would lose any artistic streak. I mean, if i were happy and even had my own home, I would not be able to enjoy 2/3 of my CD collection! Catherine Wheel's beautiful music would be boring. I couldn't share any misery with Layne Staley in the old Alice in Chains stuff. This stuff is my life, my friendship, my companionship. And, I wouldn't be able to act as well. Forget about creating music, too (which I had been meaning to do...someday) - all the pent up feelings that would come out beautifully in meaningful, great lyrics and music would be gone...any inspiration would be dried up.
So, I try to sabotage when things go well...I have always done this, but it has only been clear to me the last couple of years, I think.
But yea, things are going very well with work, school, my acting....OH MY GOD I CAN'T LIVE THIS WAY!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha....
Music nowadays is amazing. New Queensryche, new Alice in Chains, new Blondie, and a host of young, talented rock bands out there - none as big as whatever is going on in pop music and hip-hop, but good stuff nonetheless. Black Sabbath's recent album "13" went to NUMERO UNO on the Billboard Charts! I had no idea there still WAS a Billboard chart. If that #1 rank was attributed to sales or airply, I would not know becauseit's a rarity I never listen to commercial FM radio!
"Aunt Betty" just rocked my world for two months or more, and retains the top spot on that strength. The quirky song by Splashh threatens, though! What a catchy, great tune. I suspect this is the last time I hear from that band, though.
What's that, a typographical error? The new entry......why, yes, its "Geoff Tate's Queensryche", not to be confused with his former bandmates who, on their recent album, call themselves "Queensryche". There is actually a court case (I think it's going on right now, in November) about who can use the name and so on. It's sad, actually - all the animosity between Tate and the other camp.
"Frequency Unknown", by GT's Queensryche, is a pretty darn good album, if you ask me. Not that anyone did!
Last year, Tim Hecker's amazing "In the Fog" was king. That is one of the most delightful ambient music pieces I've ever heard. (I just use "ambient" as a term to collectively mean synth/electronica/techno).
And would you look at that? Ten years ago, Smile Empty Soul charted with that pretty cool song. I completely forgot about it until I heard it TWICE in two days last September in Buffalo. I was up there to do a movie shoot - no big deal. It was a significant movie but no one will ever see it. Anyway, "Bottom of a Bottle" is a seriously great rocker.
I love November. I almost, for the first time since childhood (decades ago), almost love myself (in a non-narcissistic way). That shit's gotta stop.... :)
NOVEMBER 2013
1. "Aunt Betty", by Middle Class Rut 1, 1, 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M16XAxr8TIY
2. "All I Wanna Do", by Splashh -3,2,2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUNArMF_vDI
3."Fall In", by Cloud Nothings 5,3,2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0l5lJDvqWi4
4. "Cold", by Geoff Tate's Queensryche -,5,1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzDJHuxBTUw
5. "Glass Mountain", by Radiana 2,1,6
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL4gIiuCB-A
NOVEMBER 2012
1. "In the Fog, Part I/II/III", by Tim Hecker 1, 1, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytQLA77X6Qw
2. "End to the Lies", by Jane's Addiction 2, 1, 7
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIFcc0OzMHQ
3. "Le Bleu", by Blondie 3, 2, 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RX82nEHV75o
4. "Irresistable Force", by Jane's Addiction -, 4, 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVOi5Hdbd7Q
5. "The Sound of Winter", by Bush 5, 1, 9
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vi06TWlKeHc
NOVEMBER 2003
1. "Like a Stone", by Audioslave
2. "Straight out of Line", by Godsmack
3. "Stillborn", by Black Label Society
4. "Bottom of a Bottle", by Smile Empty Soul
4. "Bring me to Life", by Evanescence
Things are going so well that I can't help but think of ways to sabotage everything. No, really, I think of cutting myself off from some friends. Abruptly quitting my job. I mean, ANYTHING, even suicide, anything that will hurt someone and make them feel bad. A part of me would enjoy that, even though the 'whole' of me would not.
Weird, I know. It's like I can't just enjoy being....happy. Content. Comfortable in a success that I have created for myself.
I need despair, conflict, sadnesss....This is just honesty here. I realize this problem. I do not know why I HAVE this problem, though, nor how to let it go.
I have a suspicion, though. One reason my mind works this way is that I were to 'let it go', I would lose any artistic streak. I mean, if i were happy and even had my own home, I would not be able to enjoy 2/3 of my CD collection! Catherine Wheel's beautiful music would be boring. I couldn't share any misery with Layne Staley in the old Alice in Chains stuff. This stuff is my life, my friendship, my companionship. And, I wouldn't be able to act as well. Forget about creating music, too (which I had been meaning to do...someday) - all the pent up feelings that would come out beautifully in meaningful, great lyrics and music would be gone...any inspiration would be dried up.
So, I try to sabotage when things go well...I have always done this, but it has only been clear to me the last couple of years, I think.
But yea, things are going very well with work, school, my acting....OH MY GOD I CAN'T LIVE THIS WAY!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha....
Music nowadays is amazing. New Queensryche, new Alice in Chains, new Blondie, and a host of young, talented rock bands out there - none as big as whatever is going on in pop music and hip-hop, but good stuff nonetheless. Black Sabbath's recent album "13" went to NUMERO UNO on the Billboard Charts! I had no idea there still WAS a Billboard chart. If that #1 rank was attributed to sales or airply, I would not know because
"Aunt Betty" just rocked my world for two months or more, and retains the top spot on that strength. The quirky song by Splashh threatens, though! What a catchy, great tune. I suspect this is the last time I hear from that band, though.
What's that, a typographical error? The new entry......why, yes, its "Geoff Tate's Queensryche", not to be confused with his former bandmates who, on their recent album, call themselves "Queensryche". There is actually a court case (I think it's going on right now, in November) about who can use the name and so on. It's sad, actually - all the animosity between Tate and the other camp.
"Frequency Unknown", by GT's Queensryche, is a pretty darn good album, if you ask me. Not that anyone did!
Last year, Tim Hecker's amazing "In the Fog" was king. That is one of the most delightful ambient music pieces I've ever heard. (I just use "ambient" as a term to collectively mean synth/electronica/techno).
And would you look at that? Ten years ago, Smile Empty Soul charted with that pretty cool song. I completely forgot about it until I heard it TWICE in two days last September in Buffalo. I was up there to do a movie shoot - no big deal. It was a significant movie but no one will ever see it. Anyway, "Bottom of a Bottle" is a seriously great rocker.
I love November. I almost, for the first time since childhood (decades ago), almost love myself (in a non-narcissistic way). That shit's gotta stop.... :)
NOVEMBER 2013
1. "Aunt Betty", by Middle Class Rut 1, 1, 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M16XAxr8TIY
2. "All I Wanna Do", by Splashh -3,2,2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUNArMF_vDI
3."Fall In", by Cloud Nothings 5,3,2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0l5lJDvqWi4
4. "Cold", by Geoff Tate's Queensryche -,5,1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzDJHuxBTUw
5. "Glass Mountain", by Radiana 2,1,6
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL4gIiuCB-A
NOVEMBER 2012
1. "In the Fog, Part I/II/III", by Tim Hecker 1, 1, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytQLA77X6Qw
2. "End to the Lies", by Jane's Addiction 2, 1, 7
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIFcc0OzMHQ
3. "Le Bleu", by Blondie 3, 2, 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RX82nEHV75o
4. "Irresistable Force", by Jane's Addiction -, 4, 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVOi5Hdbd7Q
5. "The Sound of Winter", by Bush 5, 1, 9
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vi06TWlKeHc
NOVEMBER 2003
1. "Like a Stone", by Audioslave
2. "Straight out of Line", by Godsmack
3. "Stillborn", by Black Label Society
4. "Bottom of a Bottle", by Smile Empty Soul
4. "Bring me to Life", by Evanescence
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