JUNE 2011

Wow - late June. Yes, I'm a couple weeks late posting this month's chart.

I'm depressed. I'm lonely. I actually prefer being alone, but at times during the week I think how incredible it would be to have someone to see, if just to meet for a quick dinner.

Life seems overrated at times. But at other times, incredibly worth experiencing. I have always been a person of extremes - wanting to kill myself for a couple days in a row, then feeling the excitement of something like bicycling, an amusement park, or roller blading, and feeling so great that I think I can conquer the world.

That must be why I can gravitate to a band like Godsmack, then something very aural and lush, like Florence and the Machine's "Cosmic Love" (which fell out of the top 5 a couple months ago). Anything in between - forget it. For the most part.

I am in typical form, of which I've suffered since adolescence. I'm in my 40s now, and what has changed - alone, coming up short of my goals (always), etc. Only now, it's serious, what with my being underemployed and seemingly having no path, no direction to what I should be doing for a living. I guess I will be poor for the rest of my life...and just monetarily. Well, inside, my being "poor" (of spirit) probably doesn't matter, because in there, I'm so near being dead.

Here are the top songs for this month...


JUNE 2011
1. "Someone Like You", by Adele 1, 1, 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qemWRToNYJY

2. "Shake Me Down", by Cage the Elephant 4, 2, 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v27TRan1SBI

3. "New Low", by Middle Class Rut -, 3, 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5GYOsKLp6o

4. "Colors of Life", by Mystic 5, 4, 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzI4Ns_uJ_Q

5. "Rolling in the Deep", by Adele 2, 1, 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYEDA3JcQqw


JUNE 2010
1. "It's Your Decision", by Alice in Chains 3, 1, 3
2. "Private Hell" by Alice in Chains 1, 1, 6
3. "ATX", by Alberta Cross 2, 2, 4
4. "1901", by Phoenix 4, 4, 2
5. "Crying Like a Bitch", by Godsmack -, 5, 1

JUNE 2001
1. "One Step Closer", by Linkin Park
2. "Greed", by Godsmack
3. "Beautiful Day", by U2
4. "Outside", by Aaron Lewis/Fred Durst
5. "Awake", by Godsmack

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

OCTOBER 2013

This month's is very late. Next week it will have to be updated again. Two new entries, from bands I had previously never heard of, and will probably not hear from again!  In any case, the new entries are great, uplifting, dare i say 'joyous' rock songs. Radiana is holding on to a very respectable showing. I think it was #1 for just a week, but let's face it - ANY artist covets a showing in my Top 5.  FACT! "Aunt Betty" is one of those songs with a very heavy rhythm and perhaps vocals I find poignant that just dominate. An example of that might be Stone Temple Pilots' "Trippin' on a Hole in a Paper Heart", which was on the charts for EIGHT months. I love that chorus "I am I am I am myself - I'm not dead but I'm not for sale....". I am numb again, lately - some place between happiness in life but teetering on depression. Same old same old, but I guess I'll take this rather than the byproducts of actually being dep...
Read more

FEBRUARY 2016

OK, my final class for graduate school is...a bear. I am struggling, but persevering. Besides that, things are going OK.  I am feeling good physically - I am working out, not indulging too much in chocolate or sweets (my kryptonite), and taking care of my back.  I have to see a doctor next week for a persistent problem in my throat, though - it's like a cold, but without a sore throat or other symptoms.  I only have a restrictive passageway at times (trouble swallowing food), and phlegm.  Isn't that just sexy?  But it's not a cold or a virus or anything - antibiotics don't work. That's it for now - gotta hit the books. Music.... Late this month, but that's OK. I am pretty sure the monthly Top 5 the way it looks now is how it would have had I updated it at the beginning of February.   Another entry by Mastodon!  This may not be the last one (it is currently the fourth) from the album.  There could be at least one more Top 5er. ...
Read more

May 2018

I am at a strange peace.  I went to church tonight, and as usual, my mind strayed for most of it.  Sorry, but I have some kind of adult deficit disorder thing.  At least I went.  I do take spirituality seriously.  I can honestly say I have my doubts ANYTHING about it is true, but at the same time, my mind finds justification about the existence of God.  Hmmm...nah, will delve into it in a future posting, maybe. Well, I took a scalding hot shower after re-reading my previous month's post.  Yes, with clear conscious I was involved in meaningless encounters, but I wince when I read what sounds like gloating about it.  I probably will never have a long lasting, deep relationship.  I think I've known this for over 2 decades. I just can't do it - I am damaged in a way and that is why marriage will never happen, I guess. But that in no way means a life is mis-used. You can still touch people deeply (I am restraining to make a frat boy comment he...
Read more